I am proud to share with you, Nicole’s story

Polopeace – Tom’s treat 🙏🏻

First of all I’d like to start by saying that I deeply believe that everything happens for a reason. So my mum and Tom’s dad playing tennis and getting acquainted; no co-incidence. Me ending up talking to Tom’s father and him saying that Tom and I have an awful lot in common and that I should check out his project “Polopos Wisdom”; no co-incidence. But we often tend to ignore important signs that come to us and let the mind give us all kinds of reasons why not to follow our hunch. Nevertheless I felt the urge to get in touch with Tom.

Our first whatsapp conversation he tells me he’s on a hike, I say “say hi to the eagles for me” and what does he see? Two eagles. Still I wasn’t sure on emerging myself in this retreat where I would be exposed for sure since Tom is a seer.

I have been on this quest of connecting to my true essence for quite some time now. Feeling freely, embracing life, trusting the process, love and be loved. It’s not always an easy road and a lonely road sometimes for sure. I have asked myself so many times “why can’t I just feel / be normal?” But what is that anyway? Since there are always reasons to not do things, I decided that the one reason I felt to go on this journey had to be enough. And that reason was going out of my comfort zone once again and seek the adventure. Trying to work on my engaging in the relationships with men and myself.

The first day was relaxed, I immediately felt at ease with Tom and was sharing my stories. That last word became important during my stay, but more about that later. Tom’s gift is connecting to the one he calls God. I got to ask him a direct question before he got to sleep or he was just open to receiving whatever was useful for my process.

The first night he got this dream in which I was mummified and at one point my face fell off. The song that accompanied the dream was “Ik voel me zo verdomd alleen” (I feel so damn lonely) – Danny de Munck. The message the dream contained was that I wasn’t showing my true face.

When confronted with that I cried. It is true that I often wear a mask; I don’t show or even feel my true feelings and have a difficult time being truly voulnerable. That is part of the lonely road; covering up the sadness there is deep inside.

From that point on it was ‘game on’. Tom was my mirror, but in all the similarities we experience it became two-way traffic. I asked him to give me ‘tough love’; meaning that he could be extremely blunt when I was clinging to my past, my stories or my patterns. And that became the way we roll. No more stories from the past or making up stories to be an excuse for the future. Speaking our truth without the bullshit, listen to the heart, be true and pure, listen to understand instead of to respond.

Just a few from the lessons learned this week. While writing this “Lessons in love” – Level42 comes up, that’s what they ultimately are. Love for ourselves in the first place. I have always had difficulties in my relationship with men and during this week it became really clear why. I didn’t show my true face and try to live up to others/my own expectations of the way things should be instead of connecting to and expressing what I really felt or need.

So I was always holding back or hiding in a way. I became an expert at fleeing in my head and in substances. Also I (mis)used sexuality to get what I thought I needed or wanted. I have been looking for love in the wrong places. Seeking confirmation on one hand and trying to avoid the fear of rejection on the other hand.

Now I was with this handsome man, who is spiritually evolved, sensitive, sportive, caring, intelligent and with so much in common. That should be the ingredients for trouble you’d say. It could have been, but instead of falling for old patterns we talked about this and connected on a level beyond the physical.

It turned out to be so clarifying and healing. It’s an open door that you have to love yourself first, but also not that easy. Tom mentioned a metaphor; treat yourself like you would treat your baby. Nurture yourself and pay attention to signals your being is giving you.

“Words don’t come easy” was one of the many songs that popped up during the week. As to describing what more I experienced and learned there could be so many words, but I have to let this settle in so the words don’t come that easy at this point and won’t do justice to what I felt and feel. As Tom would say; it would just be another story 😉

If you are ready for some serious confronting with yourself, your fears, your patterns, your beliefs and pushing your physical and emotional limits; Tom is your man. This was a true journey on body-mind-spirit level and I am really grateful and enriched. If you want a shortcut to clarification I’d highly recommend working with him in Spain or in Holland. I know he has only a few spots left in Spain for this incredible experience, so if any of this resonates; you only need one reason 😜

Thank god for bringing us to this point and beyond 🙏🏻

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